JFYI!

By Kayla KibbePublished: Nov 11, 2024 - What to Do When Your SO’s Peen Is a Little Too Big

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Comparatively speaking, yes. According to a 2015 scientific review published in BJUI International that looked at the flaccid and erect penises of over 15,500 men, the average erect penis length is 5.16 inches. Per the review, 68 percent of men measured between 4.5 and 5.8 inches while erect. So yeah, 6 inches is above average, statistically speaking.

However, beyond the literal measurements and stats, penis size is actually pretty subjective in terms of what any given person might consider “big” or “small.” For one thing, it’s not exactly a secret that big dicks tend to dominate the porn scene, so if you’re someone who consumes a lot of adult content, 6 inches might seem smaller by comparison, says Dr. Carol Queen, in-house sexologist at GoodVibes.

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The appearance or perception of penis size can also vary depending on overall body size, adds Finn. For example, “a short, thin person with a 6-inch dick may appear more well-endowed than a very tall, large person, despite having the same size.”

It’s also potentially worth keeping in mind that there are other metrics at play when it comes to penis size. While we tend to talk in terms of length, girth is also an (arguably more significant) factor, especially when it comes to partner satisfaction, says Queen. Which brings us to….

So Does Penis Size Matter?

I’ve dedicated my life and career to answering this question and I’ll gladly do it again. The answer is no. And also: maybe! And: kind of—it depends!

The only real truth of the matter is that, while there are absolutely some size queens (and kings and otherwise size royalty) out there for whom a big penis is a big deal, bigger is definitely not always better—sorry, porn lied to you.

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“Not everyone is into the stretch and fullness that can come with a big dick,” says Finn.

“For many people with vaginas, a penis can definitely be too long for comfort and may even cause pain when it strikes the cervix,” adds Queen, adding that, anecdotally, penis length seems to be more of a concern for penis-havers themselves than it is for their non-penis-having partners.

“Some folks simply do not care about their partner’s size at all,” says Finn, citing a study by sex therapist Laurie Mintz, author of Becoming Cliterate, in which exactly zero participants—all women—mentioned penis size when asked about what was most important to them in bed. “Instead, responses included things like having a partner that communicates, makes them feel comfortable, and—yes—knows where the clitoris is.”

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So yeah, that old saying about how it’s not the size of the ship, it’s the motion in the ocean? There’s more than a bit of truth to it. A bigger dick does not equal better sex.

Of course, if you are someone who prefers a well-endowed partner, the power to you! There is exactly zero shame in the size queen game and everyone has the right to pursue sex with partners who can provide the kind of experience they want. But what we all need to remember—lovers of big, small, and medium dicks alike—is that body-shaming of any kind simply isn’t it.

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Best Sex Positions for a 6-Inch Penis

Again, a 6-inch penis is slightly above average, which will likely find most 6-inch penis-havers in Goldicocks/“Boyfriend Dick” territory where pretty much all sex positions are on the table/unlikely to be affected by size.

Once again, it really comes down to preference. Some partners may crave more depth while others find a full six inches a bit much. (For reference, the average vaginal canal is around 4-5 inches when aroused, notes Finn—meaning a 6-inch dick is often plenty to work with.)

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“If your partner wants more depth, a hit-it-from-the-back position, like doggy style or bent over a sex positioning pillow, can help to get the entire length of a 6-incher inside,” says Finn. “If they want less depth, a position that allows the partner to control the depth of the thrust, like cowgirl, could be a great option.”

Of course, it’s important to keep in mind that when we’re talking about best sex positions in terms of penis length, we’re really only talking about penetrative sex. Which, in case you haven’t heard, is very much not the end-all, be-all of satisfying sex—especially for vagina-havers.

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“Intercourse is not the primary source of high arousal and orgasm for most women/people with vulvas,” says Queen. More often, clitoral stimulation—via toys, fingers, mouths, etc.—is a much bigger player in terms of sexual satisfaction, which has pretty much nothing at all to do with penis size.

So whatever size shaft you’re working with, consider this your reminder to never neglect the importance of non-penetrative play. This has been a public service announcement brought to you by the offices of Size May Not Matter, But Foreplay Sure As Hell Does!

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